As parents, we try to teach our kids to distinguish between good and wrong, but we frequently fall short for a variety of reasons. One father discovered that his daughter had been picking on a student with cancer at school.
The father eventually removed the post after receiving criticism for how he handled his bully daughter.
“My ex-wife and I have a 16-year-old daughter together of which I have full custody (she has moved on with her new family)… My daughter recently got in trouble at school for making fun of a student that lost her hair from cancer treatment. Including pulling off her wig,” he started his post.
“Apparently there is some pre-existing bad blood between the two of them, but I don’t think that even begins to excuse her behavior.”
As it came out, they weren’t fond of each other because his daughter was now dating this other girl’s ex-boyfriend.
“At some point the other girl mentioned how my daughter’s boyfriend was just using her for sex (this was actually a big shock to me as I had no idea she was sexually active) and called my daughter a sl*t,” the father shared.
“That’s what escalated the situation and resulted in the wig incident. Supposedly they have been arguing in class ever since my daughter started dating the guy in question. Basically just stupid teenage ‘he said she said’ nonsense.”
He gave his daughter two options to pick from after learning what had happened and what she had done in an effort to teach her a lesson. The first was that he should destroy all of her equipment, and the second was that she should visit the salon and receive a bald haircut. The daughter made the latter decision and shaved her head to attend school.
“…Everyone thinks I went way overboard. Her mother went ballistic at me saying it will make her the target of bullying (kind of the point, teach her some compassion),” the father wrote.
Though not many people agreed with him, he thought he had done the right thing. Many people took the time to voice their opinions about the circumstance. One person wrote: “Your daughter is a bully because you are a bully. I seriously doubt this is the first time you used abuse and humiliation to ‘teach her a lesson.’”
Another person added: “There’s a term for what you did. It’s called child abuse. Taking away her electronics would have been an appropriate punishment. Grounding her would have been an appropriate punishment. Disrespecting her right to bodily autonomy and humiliating her is not an appropriate punishment. She’s unlikely to learn from it and if anything it risks perpetuating a cycle of bullying.”
However, there were also those who praised his parenting. “I support your decision completely. You’re her parent so you have every right to do this, it’s not abusive, it’s real life. If she’s comfortable attacking someone for something they have no choice over she needs to see how it feels,” someone in support of the father wrote.
“She will see what kind of impact actions like hers have on the victim and that will teach her a very important lesson,” another supporter added.
What do you think, then? Do you think the father’s punishment was excessive? Let us know what you think by leaving a comment below.
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